Every morning...what a blessing

When even a "really amazing thing" is a daily occurrence, it becomes part of our routine and we risk missing out on the wonderment and enjoyment of that thing.

My "really amazing thing": Getting to enter the boys' room every morning to two little faces that can't wait to see me. Whether they're happy or cranky, W & G are there waiting for me and want me to pick them up. I feel so loved. It's such a privilege to be the one they need, the one who changes their diapers and brings them in for breakfast in their jammies.

Today, I'm thinking about how it won't always be this way. Someday, of course, they'll be adults and living somewhere else. But even much sooner than that, they'll be too big for cribs and will likely walk right out their door when they wake up, in search of me or their dad. Hopefully I'll love that routine just as much. I think I'll miss these days when they're gone, though.

The push and pull of raising little ones...the whole point of parenting is to raise them into adults who will eventually not need you anymore. But I enjoy being the one to meet their needs. As much as I will enjoy their milestones of more and more independence throughout their childhood and will be proud of their steps along the way to adulthood, I'm really truly going to miss the "20 month old" time. These are sweet, sweet days.

Grandma & I took them to the park yesterday after work. It's been such strange weather for mid-July in the Midwest, with a high of 75 degrees and low humidity!  We took their sand toys along and throughout the evening they ran along the park's paths, jumped on the bases in the baseball diamond, climbed the playground equipment, went down the slides, and interacted with new little kids.  Because Grandma was there, we could switch off following one or the other of the boys and we all had a great time. It's funny - they really don't have much of a need to be near one another when we're in public and I think that's really healthy. At least I hope so. I want them to be close friends, but I also really want them to not be "needy/clingy" with each other as twins. It's good for them to have different interests and enjoy other kids.

Sharing and kindness

Most of the time, W & G are competitive with each other and like to take the toy they want, even if their brother happens to be playing with the toy at the time. So it was such a welcome warm & happy event last night during bathtime when W had been playing with his "3 little fishies" during most of the bath and at one point lost one of them to G's side of the tub. And without any discernible request from W, G reached for the it and gave it to W. Amazing. Kindness!  G got a high-five and lots of praise. We're hoping that positive reinforcement will help kindness to grow between them.

over 3 months have passed - how did that happen?

I want to get back to writing regularly. I need to keep a better record of the boys' "firsts" than just hopefully-later-organized/collated information from emails and facebook updates. So, I'll be regularly writing here again.

Just random thoughts to quickly start off:

Yesterday I came home from work and the boys were having snack time in their high chairs and the moment I walked into the kitchen, W was practically jumping out of his chair with his arms open wide and a huge smile on his face - he couldn't wait to give me a hug. It was such an awesome moment.

A not-so-awesome moment was realizing that I absolutely could. not. find. their shoes. Despite the fact that we now have a backup pair, so we should actually have 3 pairs of size 6 shoes floating around the house. So, because I was determined to take them to the "indoor backyard" to run around freely with other kids, and obviously they have to have shoes, I quickly drove to Target to get yet another pair. Grandma & I then took them to go have lots of fun. And it was - G loved climbing up, around, and sliding down the big "climber thing" (what do I call this?) and W spent most of the time focusing on the bean/pea-filled "sandbox", filling up his buckets and pouring from his scoops. I met another mom who had a little boy just a couple months older who was also playing in the room with W. It was nice to chat. I love seeing the boys get to run around and experience life with other little kids. Even when those interactions stress them out - W is very possessive of the things he's playing with (understandably so!) and so when the other little boy took his bucket he was very upset. G is extremely laid back and in most cases will surrender his toy to his brother or to whomever else wants it. I'm pretty sure his behavior is in the minority for 20 month olds. Not that I mind!

This evening I'm planning to try out one of the little activities I found on a website http://theimaginationtree.com/2012/06/benefits-of-playing-with-play-dough.html

I'm going to stick dry spaghetti noodles in the play dough we made this week and give them Cheerios to thread through them. Hopefully they'll have fun and won't be frustrated!

boys will be boys

While I'm sure that toddler girls are just as capable as boys when it comes to injuring themselves - WOW, do these boys know how to get into precarious situations. Which result in injuries that make their mother cringe. Yesterday it was all about W and his climbing escapades in (the safety of?) our living room. All of this happened while I was at work and Jerry was home with them. The first fall happened while he was there watching them. I had mistakenly thought they were ready to safely enjoy the little 6-8 inch high stools they'd been given as gifts when they were born (puzzle-piece'd letters of their names on the tops).  I brought them out of their closet the evening before in an attempt to give them something "new" to capture their attention for more than 5 minutes. Well, yesterday morning, W was standing on this stool and fell off, somehow scraping the side of his head on the edge of it, resulting in a big scrape at his temple. Jerry confiscated the stools and put them back in storage. Then yesterday afternoon, he was changing G's diaper in their bedroom and W was playing alone in the living room. When suddenly he apparently had pulled his little toy piano next to the couch, climbed up on top of it and tried to fling himself onto the couch, but slipped and ended up with a huge bruise underneath his eye on the same side as the temple scrape.  Jerry called me at work, to warn me that W wasn't going to look very good when I got home. He was right. W looks like a boxer who's been through a round or two.

At least we haven't had any biting episodes since we've committed to always being present with them when the boys are together, scolding any attempts made toward open mouthed aggression.  A good thing, since they've been invited to their first play date this Sunday morning with the 2 year old son of one of the physicians I support. Should be interesting. At least the weather is (finally) supposed to be spring-like and we can hopefully spend the time outside.

Losing fingernails?

The moral of this short story is that I need to give Jerry more credit than I do. I'm ashamed to admit that I find myself generally assuming that I know more than he does when it comes to parenting. Well, we noticed this weekend that 2 of little G's fingernails look like they're coming off.  In my experience, this only happens when there's a severe injury to the nail bed, like fingers are smashed by a heavy object or slammed in a car door - basically, a severe accident must have happened.  But - I did think it was really odd that there was no bruising and we hadn't noticed him being upset about his fingers.  Jerry said he think it's probably because of the hand-foot-mouth disease they had over a month ago.  Honestly, I thought this was ridiculous and that he probably didn't want to admit that we'd somehow missed a severe injury.  But, I was curious enough to Google it and lo & behold, this is a thing.  According to Wikipedia, fingernail loss can happen in some kids who get HFMD, about 4-8 weeks after they're sick.  I'm guessing there were blisters in/around the nail bed of those 2 fingers and they disrupted the nail growth.  And now, the nails are about to fall off.  Amazing.

the biting/the hitting

Augh. I can't believe that I didn't think of this before, but I finally checked the AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) site for professional/scientific advice about toddler aggression.

And it turns out that while independent play is a good thing, toddlers who are with their playmates should not be left unsupervised.  Meaning, we should not be leaving W & G alone to play together while we're in the kitchen or doing laundry or whatever else.  Especially since they've both been aggressive with each other.  I can't believe I didn't think of that.

So the new thing as of this morning is that if they're awake together, there must be an adult actively supervising at all times.  This means that if Grandma is working in the kitchen, the boys need to either be in their highchairs watching her or we need to babyproof the kitchen so that one or both can play in there.  Or - we need to completely babyproof a second room so that they can have truly independent play, safe from each other's aggression.  Changes on the horizon...

have to keep up!

So I know I'm busier than usual, with this grad school class on top of normal work & parenting.  And so I do give myself a break on not updating this blog as often as I'd like.  But.   I want the boys (and Jerry & me!) to someday have a good source to read about all the milestones and remember stories of their childhood.  So - must keep up!

They absolutely love the indoor playground we've taken them to twice now.  Yesterday we went there after I got home from work and G actually went down the enclosed slide!  I was up at the top with him and he could hear his Daddy down below and he went for it.

What I will likely remember most from last night:

• W wanting to be held & walked around and the way he held tightly to my shirt at the shoulder/neck.  I love being a source of comfort - a good part of being Mommy.  
• G getting bear-hugged out of nowhere by a little boy who told me later that he's 4.  Which I kinda doubt - he wasn't much taller than G.  And G took the hug in stride, just looking at this little boy in wonder.  
• Out of all the many many toys and activities available, G spent 20 minutes focused on a push broom that someone had left out against the wall.  He was determined to play with it and I was determined to not let him.  I won (lol), but he proceeded to have a little tantrum on the floor.  It must be really hard to have big emotions, but no words to communicate about it.
• Jerry having about enough of the loud noise & chaos toward the end.  It really can be a lot.  But, that's parenting!